Accounting/Auditing Jokes

Top 3 Worst Pick-Up Lines for Accountants [actually Top 10 but i cut down]

3) I'd do just about anything to see your GAAP.

2) Can I put my substance all over your form?

...and the #1 worst accounting pick-up line is...

1) So, how do you feel about things in arrears?


Q: Why did the auditor cross the road?
A: Because he looked in the file, and that's what he did last year.

Q: Why did the auditor cross back?
A: So that he could charge travel expenses to the client!

Q: What's an auditor?
A: Someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.

Q: What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?
A: Depreciation. [LOL]

Got it from this Facebook group. It's so funny because they're all so true x)


Simple explanations for non-Accounts/Audit peeps:
- GAAP stands for Generally Accepted Accounting Principles, which is the standard for Accounting in the US.
- Substance over form is a concept in one of those GAAPs.
- Arrears means owing.
- They always say that auditors merely refer to their past-year working papers and just follow what they did previously without regards to new circumstances and information.
- And also that they charge all sorts of random expenses to their clients.
- Depreciation is like a theoretical using up of a fixed asset e.g. machinery. Each year its value drops because it has been used.