Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
...FML?
Today, I randomly decided to go on the FML site. I checked out the top FMLs and saw this:
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I don't know what's wrong with that. My boyfriend does that. MLIAwesome.
-
Sucks having to sleep without you next to me. But I know you're having it worse, being in an unfamiliar place and all. Take care baby and rest well. I'm waiting for your return :) Love you.
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I don't know what's wrong with that. My boyfriend does that. MLIAwesome.
-
Sucks having to sleep without you next to me. But I know you're having it worse, being in an unfamiliar place and all. Take care baby and rest well. I'm waiting for your return :) Love you.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Symptoms.
It's as close as I get to feeling like the hellish 5 months of last year. But at least this time, I don't have to pretend I don't care. I don't have to tell myself i'm wrong for needing you or that I don't deserve to.
-
How do you know you love someone?
Time passes bloody slowly when you're not with them. Every 5 minutes you check the time thinking that at least 15 minutes has passed. You search for any indication of their being - Facebook, Twitter, your phone... even when it's right next to you and not a single alert came in, but you still look in case you might have missed something.
You walk around feeling empty, thinking about only two things - what you did with them before, and what you want to do with them when you see them again. And ever so often there's a funny feeling that visits your heart, when you listen to a special song or see a special thing that reminds you of them.
Your phone rings and the first thing you think of is them. It isn't, and you feel like crying as that ounce of hope flutters away. There are so many things you want to tell them, but they aren't there to listen to you, and all you can do is write stupid blog entries, tweets, and smses just to feel like they might happen to see it.
You have loads to do but don't feel like doing any of it. You know that constantly thinking of them isn't going to help things, but you just can't stop. You read all your past smses, your old blog entries about them, which just makes things worse.
The funny feeling comes and makes tears well up in your eyes. Your phone still hasn't rang. It's 10 minutes since the last time you checked. You count the amount of time before you get to see them again, and realised it's so much longer than you had thought. Fuck.
And you just keep hoping and hoping that you'll hear from them soon.
I fucking miss you Justin.
-
How do you know you love someone?
Time passes bloody slowly when you're not with them. Every 5 minutes you check the time thinking that at least 15 minutes has passed. You search for any indication of their being - Facebook, Twitter, your phone... even when it's right next to you and not a single alert came in, but you still look in case you might have missed something.
You walk around feeling empty, thinking about only two things - what you did with them before, and what you want to do with them when you see them again. And ever so often there's a funny feeling that visits your heart, when you listen to a special song or see a special thing that reminds you of them.
Your phone rings and the first thing you think of is them. It isn't, and you feel like crying as that ounce of hope flutters away. There are so many things you want to tell them, but they aren't there to listen to you, and all you can do is write stupid blog entries, tweets, and smses just to feel like they might happen to see it.
You have loads to do but don't feel like doing any of it. You know that constantly thinking of them isn't going to help things, but you just can't stop. You read all your past smses, your old blog entries about them, which just makes things worse.
The funny feeling comes and makes tears well up in your eyes. Your phone still hasn't rang. It's 10 minutes since the last time you checked. You count the amount of time before you get to see them again, and realised it's so much longer than you had thought. Fuck.
And you just keep hoping and hoping that you'll hear from them soon.
I fucking miss you Justin.
3 longest days.
Been a while since I felt this way. Maybe about a year or so?
Like time started crawling the moment you left. I keep doing things to keep myself occupied but it doesn't make any difference. I went home, did some things, took a nap... Woke up, and right now, you're still on the plane.
I find myself wondering how you are. Have you had dinner? Are you resting? You were tired this morning. Are you nervous about what you'll see when you land? Will you know what to do?
And, as always. Are you thinking of me?
It's okay, you'll be back in 3 days'. Forever will pass soon enough.
Stray car :)
Last year was way worse anyway :)
-
I'll be wearing your clothes all weekend. Finding all sorts of ways to keep you as close to me as possible.
Like time started crawling the moment you left. I keep doing things to keep myself occupied but it doesn't make any difference. I went home, did some things, took a nap... Woke up, and right now, you're still on the plane.
I find myself wondering how you are. Have you had dinner? Are you resting? You were tired this morning. Are you nervous about what you'll see when you land? Will you know what to do?
And, as always. Are you thinking of me?
It's okay, you'll be back in 3 days'. Forever will pass soon enough.
Stray car :)
Last year was way worse anyway :)
-
I'll be wearing your clothes all weekend. Finding all sorts of ways to keep you as close to me as possible.
Freud's Id, Ego & Superego.
The id comprises the unorganised part of the personality structure that contains the basic drives. The id acts according to the "pleasure principle", seeking to avoid pain or unpleasure aroused by increases in instinctual tension.
The Ego acts according to the reality principle; i.e. it seeks to please the id’s drive in realistic ways that will benefit in the long term rather than bringing grief.
Regression, according to psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud, is a defense mechanism leading to the temporary or long-term reversion of the ego to an earlier stage of development rather than handling unacceptable impulses in a more adult way.
The Ego acts according to the reality principle; i.e. it seeks to please the id’s drive in realistic ways that will benefit in the long term rather than bringing grief.
Regression, according to psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud, is a defense mechanism leading to the temporary or long-term reversion of the ego to an earlier stage of development rather than handling unacceptable impulses in a more adult way.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
:)
Isn't it always amusing whenever someone around you talks trash about something you do/like/have/are without knowing it? And then you just sit there and smile, nodding your head in agreement, all the while thinking about how stupid they're portraying themselves to be.
:)
:)
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Learned helplessness.
Is when something you don't like is happening/about to happen to you, and you just sit there, shut up and do nothing about it. Because you've learnt from past experiences that whether you do anything or not, it doesn't make any difference.
Ah, good memories.
Was throwing out a piece of rope when I remembered this once in secondary school, some guys were playing with some rope and wanted to test something. I don't know if they were too cowardly to do it on their own or what. They asked to borrow my wrist, wrapped the rope around it,
and pulled the rope off.
If you look carefully you can still see the ropeburn scar there :)
Thanks Jun Hui ;)
and pulled the rope off.
If you look carefully you can still see the ropeburn scar there :)
Thanks Jun Hui ;)
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
F.
If you can't differentiate a daughter and a worker, I'm not gonna bother differentiating a father and a stranger.
-
Turns out I really throw/slam anything I'm holding when I'm pissed. Most recent victim: Laptop.
-
Turns out I really throw/slam anything I'm holding when I'm pissed. Most recent victim: Laptop.
Monday, March 14, 2011
And they went, "Poof!"
Reading past blog entries, trying to recall what on earth I used to do in my free time.
And where they've all gone.
-
Much of my time in NTU was taken up by Soul Funky. Like i've said many times before, if it wasn't for Soul Funky, I wouldn't be in school. In the first semester when there's no JDC, I would be training for performances, or doing some teaching [that was when we didn't have an instructor]. Or doing admin. Yeah :) Chatting with Fabby a lot. And of course when JDC came about in the second semester, it basically took up whatever remaining time we had.
Other than that, I used to run. Especially when I was working. Went running at East Coast with Mom and Aunty Jo thrice a week. When I had school, it was less, because I couldn't make it in the evenings. Oh, I did 21km for my 21st birthday :) Proud of it.
I told stories at the library every other Saturday to young kids [pedobear hahaha]. Stopped last year in August after I dyed my hair pink, because I didn't want to be a bad influence to the children. And also because it prevented me from hanging out late on Friday, and made it difficult to plan my Saturdays. I also did other ad-hoc volunteering activities. Hmmm. Should probably start doing it again.
This. Lol. Yeah I spent quite a bit of time playing games. Whether it was out of Quil-influence or brother-influence. And the rest of the time was hanging out on forums talking rubbish and laughing at flame wars. And chatting on MSN. For some strange unknown reason, the internet suddenly lost its appeal.
Oh yeah I used to spend a lot of time on Youtube. Call me childish, but I used to catch Disney's Suite Life of Zac and Cody/Suite Life on Deck as well as Wizards of Waverly Place. And of course a ton of Whose Line, which I never got sick of watching. Sometimes a bit of Taiwanese dramas here and there.
I wrote! Yeah I almost forgot about that :) I used to write when I emo-ed, which resulted in a lot of shitty emo stories lol. So many ideas that I never got down to writing, and now i've forgotten them. Oh well :)
Walking down the beach at Changi :) Good thing I still get to do that once in a while with my bros.
I still dive, but it takes up a lot of money and time. On the rare occasions that I get to do it, it's awesome :D
Yeah I think that was mostly it. I lost most of them when my life and priorities got messed up a while back. Gotta go remember what being passionate about something feels like :)
And where they've all gone.
-
Much of my time in NTU was taken up by Soul Funky. Like i've said many times before, if it wasn't for Soul Funky, I wouldn't be in school. In the first semester when there's no JDC, I would be training for performances, or doing some teaching [that was when we didn't have an instructor]. Or doing admin. Yeah :) Chatting with Fabby a lot. And of course when JDC came about in the second semester, it basically took up whatever remaining time we had.
Other than that, I used to run. Especially when I was working. Went running at East Coast with Mom and Aunty Jo thrice a week. When I had school, it was less, because I couldn't make it in the evenings. Oh, I did 21km for my 21st birthday :) Proud of it.
I told stories at the library every other Saturday to young kids [pedobear hahaha]. Stopped last year in August after I dyed my hair pink, because I didn't want to be a bad influence to the children. And also because it prevented me from hanging out late on Friday, and made it difficult to plan my Saturdays. I also did other ad-hoc volunteering activities. Hmmm. Should probably start doing it again.
This. Lol. Yeah I spent quite a bit of time playing games. Whether it was out of Quil-influence or brother-influence. And the rest of the time was hanging out on forums talking rubbish and laughing at flame wars. And chatting on MSN. For some strange unknown reason, the internet suddenly lost its appeal.
Oh yeah I used to spend a lot of time on Youtube. Call me childish, but I used to catch Disney's Suite Life of Zac and Cody/Suite Life on Deck as well as Wizards of Waverly Place. And of course a ton of Whose Line, which I never got sick of watching. Sometimes a bit of Taiwanese dramas here and there.
I wrote! Yeah I almost forgot about that :) I used to write when I emo-ed, which resulted in a lot of shitty emo stories lol. So many ideas that I never got down to writing, and now i've forgotten them. Oh well :)
Walking down the beach at Changi :) Good thing I still get to do that once in a while with my bros.
I still dive, but it takes up a lot of money and time. On the rare occasions that I get to do it, it's awesome :D
Yeah I think that was mostly it. I lost most of them when my life and priorities got messed up a while back. Gotta go remember what being passionate about something feels like :)
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Hahahahahahaha.
Loretta Sze says
sometimes you just gotta laugh at the shit life throws at you
pretend everything is fine
china got earthquake
my father is in china and i haven't heard from him in months
hahahahahaha
i wanted to let out my emotions with my boyfriend but he's too tired to entertain me
hahahahahaa
fuck you, life
:)
Ong Kah Hui says
lol
life.
sometimes you just gotta laugh at the shit life throws at you
pretend everything is fine
china got earthquake
my father is in china and i haven't heard from him in months
hahahahahaha
i wanted to let out my emotions with my boyfriend but he's too tired to entertain me
hahahahahaa
fuck you, life
:)
Ong Kah Hui says
lol
life.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Past.
Re-reading the diary in which I wrote about J and me.
That funny tingly feeling that I haven't felt in a long while came back.
I miss you baby.
That funny tingly feeling that I haven't felt in a long while came back.
I miss you baby.
Friday, March 11, 2011
:'(
"1258 GMT: Millions of people in greater Tokyo are stranded far away from home as evening falls after Japan's biggest earthquake on record shut down the capital's massive subway system, my colleagues report from Tokyo.
Countless workers, who had earlier fled violently swaying office blocks, found themselves stuck far from their families -- and unable to speak to them because the overloaded mobile phone system could not carry most calls, they tell me."
Live report on the Japan quake.
Countless workers, who had earlier fled violently swaying office blocks, found themselves stuck far from their families -- and unable to speak to them because the overloaded mobile phone system could not carry most calls, they tell me."
Live report on the Japan quake.
Dug up an old Friendster bulletin from 5 years ago.
1. My ex is...
2006: Wang Shao Wei. LOL.
2011: Apparently, now attached. Good for him! :)
2. I am listening to..
2006: Nothing.
2011: Nothing.
3. Maybe I should...
2006: Start studying. But i'll leave that for later.
2011: Start writing my essay. But i'll leave that for later.
4. I love...
2006: Chan Kwang Siong.
2011: Eggtarts. Do you love eggtarts? :)
5. My bestfriend(s)...
2006: Are insane. Are Quil, Pope and Brain. Are the girls.
2011: Are the same damn best friends I had 5 years ago. Hell, 10 years ago. Oh, with the inclusion of Jbooboo :)
6. I don't understand...
2006: How i can announce to everyone that i'm going to do something, then end up not doing it. But thankfully it doesn't really affect them.
2011: Half the things that are taught in class. But i'll leave that for later.
7. I lost...
2006: My ...
2011: ... mind?
8. People say...
2006: Moo.
2011: Moo.
10. Love is...
2006: A great pile of crap. Hey, at least i said it's great.
2011: One of the words inked on my back.
11. Somewhere, someone is...
2006: picking their nose.
2011: and flicking that booger at someone else.
12. I will always...
2006: Regret my actions.
2011: Remember.
13. Forever seems...
2006: Impossible.
2011: Like a long time away :/
14. I never want to...
2006: Lose the people i love.
2011: Lose the people i love.
15. My mobile phone...
2006: Is my precious and i can't live without it.
2011: Is an iPhone and I can't understand why I said the above in 2006.
16. When I wake up in the morning...
2006: I start to count how many hours its been since i slept. I'm not kidding. Then from there i decide if i should continue sleeping.
2011: I get out of bed, cover J with the blanket and go wash up.
17. I get annoyed when..
2006: People dash my hopes.
2011: People dash my hopes.
18. Parties are...
2006: Boring. I dislike them.
2011: Groups of people with whom you can do quests with.
19. My pets are...
2006: [Insert a picture of Kinty here]
2011: Kinty.
20. Kisses are the best when...
2006: They're on your forehead, or the back of your hand.
2011: They're the prelude to...
21. Today I...
2006: Woke up.
2011: Wasted time.
22. Tomorrow I will...
2006: Go to school in the morning and screw up my Biz Finance paper.
2011: Have fun.
23. I really want...
2006: to get straight As for my exam.
2011: some chocolate right now :D
2006: Wang Shao Wei. LOL.
2011: Apparently, now attached. Good for him! :)
2. I am listening to..
2006: Nothing.
2011: Nothing.
3. Maybe I should...
2006: Start studying. But i'll leave that for later.
2011: Start writing my essay. But i'll leave that for later.
4. I love...
2006: Chan Kwang Siong.
2011: Eggtarts. Do you love eggtarts? :)
5. My bestfriend(s)...
2006: Are insane. Are Quil, Pope and Brain. Are the girls.
2011: Are the same damn best friends I had 5 years ago. Hell, 10 years ago. Oh, with the inclusion of Jbooboo :)
6. I don't understand...
2006: How i can announce to everyone that i'm going to do something, then end up not doing it. But thankfully it doesn't really affect them.
2011: Half the things that are taught in class. But i'll leave that for later.
7. I lost...
2006: My ...
2011: ... mind?
8. People say...
2006: Moo.
2011: Moo.
10. Love is...
2006: A great pile of crap. Hey, at least i said it's great.
2011: One of the words inked on my back.
11. Somewhere, someone is...
2006: picking their nose.
2011: and flicking that booger at someone else.
12. I will always...
2006: Regret my actions.
2011: Remember.
13. Forever seems...
2006: Impossible.
2011: Like a long time away :/
14. I never want to...
2006: Lose the people i love.
2011: Lose the people i love.
15. My mobile phone...
2006: Is my precious and i can't live without it.
2011: Is an iPhone and I can't understand why I said the above in 2006.
16. When I wake up in the morning...
2006: I start to count how many hours its been since i slept. I'm not kidding. Then from there i decide if i should continue sleeping.
2011: I get out of bed, cover J with the blanket and go wash up.
17. I get annoyed when..
2006: People dash my hopes.
2011: People dash my hopes.
18. Parties are...
2006: Boring. I dislike them.
2011: Groups of people with whom you can do quests with.
19. My pets are...
2006: [Insert a picture of Kinty here]
2011: Kinty.
20. Kisses are the best when...
2006: They're on your forehead, or the back of your hand.
2011: They're the prelude to...
21. Today I...
2006: Woke up.
2011: Wasted time.
22. Tomorrow I will...
2006: Go to school in the morning and screw up my Biz Finance paper.
2011: Have fun.
23. I really want...
2006: to get straight As for my exam.
2011: some chocolate right now :D
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
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