Filial Piety

You know when your parents say that their arguments and what-nots have nothing to do with you, they're right?

How they treat each other is their business; it should have NO impact whatsoever on how you treat each individual parent. No matter how much they love or hate each other, they love you the same, and you should love them the same too.

I made that mistake. But now i know. If it's going to take me the rest of my life to return the piety i owe you, i will.

Love your family. And show it. Before it's too late.

17 Again.

It was funny, but i cried through more than half of it.

There's nothing that can be done now, but i know if you could have a second chance, you would make everything right again.

Yet another boy choir :)

Absolutely beautiful.

I think i'm becoming pedo.

HELP.

At this current moment, i'm very emotionally affected by something that's created out of my own imagination. It's extremely stupid, and distracting me from my studying which is quite a serious thing considering i've got two big topics to cover and will have to wake up at 6am later to get to school for my exam.

But i really can't help it.

Loving life.

KS has been spending the past two days teaching me Stats. Thanks Boy :)

Today was great. KS came over around lunch time, then taught me some Stats stuff. We took a nap, then went for dinner at White Sands. KFC. Then we walked around in the supermarket. It was nothing fantastic, yet i just felt really happy.

Simplicity of happiness :)

I love my friends. It's just really nice to know my old friends are always there, especially when i'm feeling lonely at NTU. I mean, sure i have friends there, but hardly any i can really hang out with.

Thanks for the SMSes - Yuxiu and Samantha
Thanks for the Facebook posts - Geraldine and Ruby
Thanks for spending time studying with me - Sharon and Yvonne
Thanks for random MSN crap - Quil
Thanks for the long phone call - Benedict

Friends are wonderful. Life is wonderful.

默许一个愿望 for you :)

I had dinner at Changi Village with KS, after which we went for a walk along the beach. [Yes i know i behave like i'm having holidays already; truth is i don't care about exams anymore (:]

We stood at the railing facing the sea, at the part where airplanes from Changi Airport fly directly over. There were lots of stars in the sky. Certainly not as much as you'd be able to see overseas, but many enough.

And i thought, if i had a wish for each of those stars, i'd wish for happiness for all of my friends :)

I always say...

I want to do this and that after my exams, but usually i never complete what's on my list. But still it's worth having something to look forward to at this moment.

- Dinner/hang out with the bros after my last paper on 22nd :)
- Steamboat with poly friends on 24th :)
- Swim/movie/anything with babes anytime :)
- Soul Funky?
- Check out internet business, again.
- Fitness training with Quil, lol.
- Redang in June
- Taiwan in July

Trying to resist the temptation to shop until i go to Taiwan :D

I haven't been working very hard in preparation for exams. It's difficult trying to catch up after i've missed so much, and to some extent i've given up. I'm already at the bottom of the bell curve, so i just hope that i'll pass all of my subjects.

It's not easy falling right to the bottom after spending much of my life being at least average.

But it doesn't matter. I'm surviving, and grades aren't everything. My life's great :)

De-NOM-inator.

Emptiness.

"Emptiness as a human condition of generalised boredom, social alienation and apathy. Feelings of emptiness often accompany dysthymia, depression, loneliness, despair, or other mental/emotional disorders such as borderline personality disorder." - Wiki

It's just PSS. It's just PSS. It's just PSS.

Facebook, YouTube at work make better employees: study

Reuters - Friday, April 3

MELBOURNE - Caught Twittering or on Facebook at work? It'll make you a better employee, according to an Australian study that shows surfing the Internet for fun during office hours increases productivity.

The University of Melbourne study showed that people who use the Internet for personal reasons at work are about 9 percent more productive that those who do not.

Study author Brent Coker, from the department of management and marketing, said "workplace Internet leisure browsing," or WILB, helped to sharpened workers' concentration.

"People need to zone out for a bit to get back their concentration," Coker said on the university's website.

"Short and unobtrusive breaks, such as a quick surf of the Internet, enables the mind to rest itself, leading to a higher total net concentration for a days' work, and as a result, increased productivity," he said.

According to the study of 300 workers, 70 percent of people who use the Internet at work engage in WILB.

Among the most popular WILB activities are searching for information about products, reading online news sites, playing online games and watching videos on YouTube.

"Firms spend millions on software to block their employees from watching videos, using social networking sites or shopping online under the pretence that it costs millions in lost productivity," said Coker. "That's not always the case."

However, Coker said the study looked at people who browsed in moderation, or were on the Internet for less than 20 percent of their total time in the office.

"Those who behave with Internet addiction tendencies will have a lower productivity than those without," he said.

I can't wait :D

To go to Pulau Redang with the family and boyfriend. Epic beach photos again! :D Fantastic snorkelling in awesome waters. Woots!

Then Taiwan the following month with the boyfriend <3 Advanced 5th anniversary celebration and birthday prezzie for me. All the sightseeing and shopping ^^ Can't wait can't wait.

Still looking for people to go with us for the Taiwan trip though. It's more convenient to travel around in fours. Any couple wanna go with us? :D

I broke my high score for Spot The Difference on Facebook! Reached level 11 wahhh xD Almost double my previous score. And if you might have noticed, i also got a high score for Bejeweled Blitz :) So yay, i'm finally gonna stop playing that [for the month at least; which is more than enough to accomodate exams].

Each day brings a new bunch of crap, but that's okay. There's more to do in life than just wallowing in misery :)

Finally.

I stopped talking to my father when i was 14. The only conversations we had were those where he would talk or ask me something, and my replies would be very annoyed, monosyllabic answers.

He called back yesterday from overseas. I don't know where. Ever since the divorce, or even before it, he had been disappearing overseas for months at a time for his business. He'd call back maybe once a month to check if everything was fine. I didn't really care.

Okay that was a total lie. I've been living in guilt all this while, for being so unfilial. I couldn't even talk to him without crying; yet i couldn't bring myself to be any nicer to him. This dissonance was really strangling me. In the recent years i've been getting better. At least my replies were less impatient than before and during those rare times that he'd call back, i would actually talk. Just a few sentences, but that's quite an achievement for me.

At the end of the phone call yesterday, i told him, "I love you."

It took me years to build up the courage to do so. Each time he returned home from overseas i told myself that i'd do it, but i never did. The last time he was going overseas, i told myself to say goodbye to him the night before. I stood outside his room door for 10 minutes and simply couldn't bring myself to knock on his door. So... i'm really proud of myself now :)

Now i'll die with no regrets.

Good thing KS was here with me yesterday, to hold me while i just wept in his arms. I think he's used to it. Thanks darling.

So i removed my extensions.

They were getting tangled and damn annoying. Instead of going back to the shop at Far East to have it removed, i got my mom to help me cut off the rubberbands tying the extensions to remove them, and spent the next few hours undoing the braids.

I dropped a LOT of hair. Considering i didn't have much to begin with, ... :(

So today i got my hair trimmed, since it was getting messy after 3 months of not cutting. I had wanted to get an entirely new hairstyle; a short one, but didn't manage to get it done. Oh well. Maybe when it gets longer, i can do more with whatever little hair i've got. I wanna do something like this:

Or even this:

My boyfriend would probably disown me -.-